My Dear Bobbie,
I want so much for you to be healed and happy. You are such a survivor, and you amaze me. You are so strong, continuing with your life, even though all the difficulties. From your computer, are you able to get onto Facebook? I have found many helpful people there.
I'm glad you reposted your chart, so that it is easier for me to see it. Saturand and Uranus have been squaring your North and South Node on and off for quite some time, and Pluto is inconjunct your Mars in Leo (which is conjunct Pluto), yet I feel that within a couple of years, things will be easier for you. I hope that I am right.
Maybe when Jupiter comes to conjunct your Moon in Pisces next year, squaring your Uranus, some emotional fulfillment will come to you, and a happier place to be for awhile. I know that there are parts of 2010 that do not look so good, but I can see some good aspects beginning that year. I am thinking that friends may possibly help you to move to a better place, or you will find a helpful person who lives at a distance from you. This may happen around February or March. Also, in 2010 and 2011, you may possibly find a more permanent home and even a relationship. At first this may be very difficult, as you will need to come to terms with who you are and why you are hurting. Saturn in Libra will become conjunct your Ascendant and Chiron in November and December of 2010. However in March and April of 2011, Jupiter, Mars and at some times the Sun, Mercury, and Venus are in Aries on your Descendant opposite Saturn in Libra and your Ascendant and Chiron. You may then have healing through a partner, and you may actually find some stability in your life. And in 2011, Pluto moves on, and is no longer inconjunct your Mars, so there should be less pain. I am not saying it will be easy, but you may finally feel as though you can move on in a way that feels more normal, even if progress is slow at times.
I really want this to happen for you. A more permanent home would help you to feel less stressed, so you would have less pain, and less pain would also help you have a more permanent home and better relationships.
At "YOGA & more" at The Sprinkler Factory
Worcester, MA USA